Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
