so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
