Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
4 words: hood of his car
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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