Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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