I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
