She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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