White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
