I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize