It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
