RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
