i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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