Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
even my farts smell like vagina
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
