i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
