Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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