Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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