Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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