we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
