I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
