I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize