I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
