last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
FUCK WHALES
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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