what if every blade of grass was a penis?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
