I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
