I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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