how can u be prego again
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
