Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
