And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
