i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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