this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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