Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize