My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
