How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
