dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Randomize
