David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
