You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
