Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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