idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
