big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
