This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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