the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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