But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
she told me i tasted like america
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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