Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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