I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize