he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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