do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
