Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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