thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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