I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
