The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
