are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
