with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize